How To Drive A Car

By:  Aria E. Appleford

When I was learning to drive, I had some difficulty.  My grandfather, who raised me, was driving with me one day and observing as I sat tense in the driver’s seat, worrying about every little bump and curve in the road as it came along, over-correcting the car’s movements.  I was obsessed with the road immediately in front of me and in checking my rear view mirror.  After awhile he suggested we pull over and take a break, so we stopped at a local restaurant and had a cold drink and a piece of pie. 


We talked about driving and he pointed out how my point of reference in the car was all wrong.  He shared his observations of what I was doing wrong and gave me some pointers to help me out.  He suggested I look way up ahead on the road to where I was going to, instead of staring at the road immediately in front of the car.  He said that if I would drive the car towards that horizon, I would find it much easier to handle and the drive would be a lot smoother.


My grandfather was never one to miss a teaching opportunity and so he continued to talk to me that afternoon long after we had solved the problems with my driving.  He told me that driving a car was like life.  If I were to focus on where I wanted to go, off in the distance and move my life towards that visible goal, life would be a lot smoother and easier and I could sit back and enjoy the drive.   Grandfather said that people tend to make two mistakes with life.  Some people are so focused on the rear view mirror that they live their life in the past and they miss what is going on in the here and now.  It’s good to check the rear view mirror occasionally – just to remind ourselves of where we have been and to learn the lessons from our past so we can make the small adjustments we need to in the present.  The other mistake people can make is when they never look up or define where they want to go and so every little bump in the road becomes some kind of  huge catastrophe and overwhelms them until many of them just pull over and give up.  He told me life’s horizon should be a simple understood ideal and that it should be a goal that applies across the board.  With that kind of a “horizon” I would be always be in the drivers seat of my life.  I never forgot my grandfather’s words.


Many of the people I counsel are unhappy in their lives.  They have lost sight of the horizon and are overwhelmed with what is happening in front of them.  Some actually believe they are incapable of maneuvering through the obstacles – they forget that with the proper perspective obstacles become pretty meaningless and insignificant.    It is one of the things I love about Silva.  The horizon Jose painted was “for the greater good of mankind.”  Everything else represents tools to achieve that goal.  Every tool is one that empowers the individual and speaks to us in the purest soul-speak – letting us know that we can do anything.  Without fail, for myself, the only times Silva does not work, is when I lose that perspective.  When I become fearful, take my eyes off the goal, and begin to try to over-correct, I fail.  When I look to the “greater good of mankind” and trust the tools I have been taught, it all just flows.  And, like my grandfather promised all those years ago, I can sit back and enjoy the ride.

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